I am reading a book called miss purity ring which is by an Afro American feminist(or a womanist) as she calls herself that is inspired by Alice Walker and tries to improve the state of Black Women in society. She talks about social stereotypes in the society and in general she mentions that women are considered the less valueable the more sexual partner they have whereas men are supposed to have more (at least it is socially acceptable to have a higher number of sexual partner than women). I think that this stems from mens desire to be the one for the woman, a leader so to say which is basically are selfish desire to uphold our ego. I do not think that it is a good thing to have more sexual partner because from the Christian point of view the message is clear-any extra marital sex is not benefitial (the question of permission in Gods eye and moral integrity can be left out for once). Nevertheless, it is our ego that must step down when we learn that our partner had more partners (be it sexual or not) before us. why is it so? I think that the romantic vision of waiting after marriage and being the first one for each other in everything is very appealiing. on the other hand, women are , I think, in this sense more pragmatic and do not delve into the past of men-maybe due to the fact that womens ego is not so focusd on themselves but rather on people around, friends, family, children, etc. Having said that, I also wonder why is the stereotype of women being more romantic than men so strong? or is it really a stereotype? I would even go so far as to say that most of the books about romantic relationships were written by men. This may not be the case because women might have more work at home whereas men had more spare time on their hands and that might be the reason why they created stories. Nevertheless, I do not think that it might be really true that women are more romantic in all aspects. I am affirmative in the point of emotional signals. women definitely in generaly pay more attention to mens paraverbal gesture, body language, gaze, posture etc. whereas men tend to be more racional and follow the words. this is one of the deepest misunderstandings. it is not all in words, as men think, and on the other hand words should be paid more attention to by women. in other words both men and women should acknowledge that their view and perception is not the one and only valid for mutual understanding but should rather focus on the way the other perceives it in order to understand more the world of wo(men).
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