Understanding other vs controlling them
I read a strange remark which said that if we want to undestand the people around us, we do it with the subconscious desire to control them and the surrounding around us. it is not possibly far from the truth. on one hand, there are these courses of alturism and empathy but are these really so contributive to the mutual understanding? what if these are really only a tools to control? i think that in the first place we must acknowledge that via trying to understand other, we also strenghten this un-altruistic base desire of ours-to subdue them-to have a way how to know what they think so that they pose no threat to us. I think that this approach is totally natural. basically all we do, we do in order to tame the world around us. to make it more bearable, known and without surprises. on the other hand, this desire does not really make us more empathic and kind towards others. if we learn empathy just in order to understand others so that we are not surprised by their actions, we inevitably pursue the primeval atavistic remnants of our ancestors. i believe that as humans we have much greater potential. trying to understand others in order to make the mutual cooperation better is the task that we should pursue. let us not think that what is natural for us-the strive for safety and security is evil- it is not, but it should not overcome us. learning to understand other with the true and genuine desire to understand them with the altruistic design of making their life better by understanding them is something that should make us incomparatably better people than just when following our instincts of safety.
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