natural reactions and what they signify

 

In my job, i sometimes come across a situation when I cannot explain satisfactorily some fact to the people I work with, namely the clients that have mental handicap. We looked after a woman that was very particular about certain stereotypical things and was very meticulous about the time table and the sequence of things coming one after another. unfortunately her mentality got stuck around one and half year which is the time that children first experience their body and this is usually accompanied with the first defiance and untill then unknown resilience in what they want, not parents. this woman knew that not all her needs could be met or helped with by us assistants, yet she could not help demanding them. I sometimes in the instances of futility refrained from talking to her and told her to meet my superior in order to deal with the situation. although I knew that she knew that she would not do it, partly because as I mentioned above she was aware of the inability of anyone to help her, I tried to direct the responsibility on her because Idid not know how to help her or explain her that we could not help her. when someone does not know an answer to the problems the one or someone else faces, one either steers the solution to find at someone else or tries to be belligerent- it is the flight or attack approach. I myself as a melancholic kind of person, when met with some situation that i cannot cope with begin to be despondent and negative, which is my kind of flight or attack from the situation. keeping the bright mind is very difficult because at such times I see no alternative and start to see all my efforts fruitless. I either put the blame on others-the client that i could not help, or I keep it in myself which results in the fits and bouts of melancholy and depression. it is after all also a kind of attack, because sometimes by the resignation I want to hurt and attack others either for what they have done to me in the past that I still remember as unjust or as a cry for help to have them around me. unfortunately people usually react the opposite way than one needs-they either start to be helpless or overprotective because they do not know how to react. it is a natural reaction. i see it in my job as well. one either resigns or tries as much as possible and both ways are contraproductive. sometimes people need not protection-which basically says that one needs help, which itself is not a pleasant feeling for the one that really needs help

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